Swingers – dispelling the myths

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There are a lot of mistaken beliefs attached to people who are swingers: they are simply sexual perverts, or they prey on vulnerable people. They are said to be shadowy underground figures and undesirables, and they are violent and masochistic. It may surprise you, however, to know that there are thought to be in excess of four million swingers in the UK alone: that is a lot of undesirables in one small country.

The above beliefs are, of course, largely mythical, and it is vital to dispel such myths as many may find swinging a beneficial exercise that can add to a relationship. It is so, however, that an element of masochism can enter some forms of sexual fantasy: this will, though, be optional and never compulsory.

Let’s have a look at why people choose to become swingers: if you have been married for a long time, and are happy with your partner, it can still be the case that sex has become boring and routine. This is far from unusual, for there is only so much one can learn about another. Swingers join the scene to add something to their mundane sex lives, by inviting others to help indulge their sexual fantasies.

It may take one being honest with yourself to admit, but I’m willing to wager you have fantasised – a number of times – about having sex with someone other than your partner: it could be a famous celebrity, or someone you see in the street, or even a workmate, but it’s natural – we all do it. I would also add that you have probably had similar fantasies about your partner indulging in sexual acts with others, too; and they will have had the same!

This is just it, for it is entirely natural for us to do so: swinging allows us to indulge in such fantasies, and also to set limits as to how far we wish to go. A decision to enter the world of swingers is always one made between you and your partner: never is it done alone, for this is not conducive to helping a relationship. Likewise, it is frequently the case that newcomers to the scene draw the line at particular acts until they are entirely happy they have done the right thing. This is a well understood protocol in the swinging scene – nobody will be expected to do anything they do not want, or have not agreed, to do.

The taboo that surrounds the swinging scene, and the swingers within, will remain as long as sex is considered a taboo subject itself; it always will be, for we see it as something that is carried out behind closed doors, and in private. Of course, that is the way it should be, but swingers enable that little bit of added excitement to be brought back into a stale sex life, and in doing so prolong the lifespan of the relationship as a result.

Thursday, February 19th, 2009 at 4:27 pm and is filed under Adult Dating. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.